Welcome ICLW'ers and updates

Hello ICLW'ers. Thanks for stopping by.
Our journey is to your right :)

A couple of updates.

We're still having some good and bad days. Father's Day was not pleasant.
My period is MIA, I'm on cd 48 and of course I get those little feelings that maybe it is a miracle. I POAS and of course it was a BIG FAT -
Hope can be such a four letter word sometimes.
It's also bringing me much anxiety. I have clockwork cycles and since the failed IVF, AF has been all over the place and now I'm starting to think there is something not right with me :( I don't want any more obstacles, I just want to move forward.

Last weekend we talked to a couple of friends of ours about our journey and moving forward. It was a great conversation. She is a LSW and he is a psychologist and it was great for DH to open up about his feelings and they left him with a lot of things to think about. He did have a breakthrough moment and it was great to see.

We've mailed out all the ds paperwork and all that is left is to pay for the gizz. It will be frozen at cryo.bank and they will deliver directly to clinic when we start IUIs. We're still not sure when that will happen but we're working on it.

DH and I have planned our vacation and CANNOT wait. We're taking a cruise from LA to Mex.ico and then flying to Vegas for a few days. It is going to be so nice to get out of this space and just relax. I have to say it is so hard for D and I to be in our home. We bought our home and hoped it would be a placed where we would have our first child and now it just makes us sad to be here. I want to move but unfortunately am stuck b/c of a residency requirement :(

Oh, and I also wanted to say how touched I am by the emails I get from blog readers. I feel so honored that people read this depressing blog and when they take the time to write to me, I get warm fuzzies. Although I hate being on this journey it makes me feel so touched that others find some comfort or feel less alone b/c of this blog. Thank you and ((HUGS))

Oh, and I am happy tr.ue blood is back. I love my fanged friends :)

Thanks to MelissaG for the Honest Scrap award - I appreciate it :)

I'm going AW for a second - I'm up to 41 books already! I think I'm going for 70 instead of 50 :)
and I'm down 10 lbs.

one step back

This roller coaster ride is in a down turn.

We were feeling better but all the ds paperwork has made everything feel fresh again. We're really saying that we won't be having a biological child together. It's sad.

We've been talking and crying and spending lots of time together. We know that we'll get to the other side one day.

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A couple of positive things :)

D and I went to Mohe.gan Sun this past weekend where I got to hang out with a few girls from my board. It was lots of fun. I made gift bags and everyone contributed something to them, they were very cute. We also broke even so that was good.

D and I are trying to get back in shape. I'm down 5lbs. (of the 40 I gained from IF stress). I'm back on the points.

We're trying to plan a vacation for early Sept. and can't agree on anything :) any suggestions?

My IUI nurse is so responsive and knowledgeable, she's really helping make this whole process smoother.